Little Liberation.
Somehow, for the very first time in a very long time, I feel liberated. Somehow, I find myself having the strength to do those things I wouldn't otherwise be doing, I somehow find myself having the courage to be vocal about my feelings even though I am pretty sure not many people have a damn to give about what they are, somehow I find myself being okay being this way.
Hello there, I am the Earthian.
I couldn't ever do it before, do this stand-up-for-who-you-are thing even though I have always wanted to for a very long time. Hiding my feelings and getting hurt is a lot different than being vocal about my feelings and getting hurt, granted, I am still getting hurt just as much but throwing in a few defensive words just for my own reassurance does count for something.
Its very easy to be a part of a group, literally all one has to do is keep lying just to find himself fitting in nice and cozy. But being voluntarily vulnerable, scratch that, being voluntarily vulnerably alone and not being embarrassed about who you are as a person, especially when that's how every single one around us wants us to feel, takes a lot more than just courage. Its like "this is who I am, like it or not, if I change, its because I want to to do it and not because YOU want me to do it, you just don't have a say".
Is it helping me? In a very weird way, it is. It sort of lets me know I am not alone even though I am indeed very, very alone. It doesn't make the hurting go away but it sure as hell doesn't make it worse.
Love, peace.
Hello there, I am the Earthian.
I couldn't ever do it before, do this stand-up-for-who-you-are thing even though I have always wanted to for a very long time. Hiding my feelings and getting hurt is a lot different than being vocal about my feelings and getting hurt, granted, I am still getting hurt just as much but throwing in a few defensive words just for my own reassurance does count for something.
Its very easy to be a part of a group, literally all one has to do is keep lying just to find himself fitting in nice and cozy. But being voluntarily vulnerable, scratch that, being voluntarily vulnerably alone and not being embarrassed about who you are as a person, especially when that's how every single one around us wants us to feel, takes a lot more than just courage. Its like "this is who I am, like it or not, if I change, its because I want to to do it and not because YOU want me to do it, you just don't have a say".
Is it helping me? In a very weird way, it is. It sort of lets me know I am not alone even though I am indeed very, very alone. It doesn't make the hurting go away but it sure as hell doesn't make it worse.
Love, peace.
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