Where It All Starts.

Have you ever kept going back to what you know is killing you from the inside? I mean, not that its physically killing you but everytime you spend some time with it you start wondering if you even have the ability to feel emotions and live. Sometimes, it'd feel like you're just existing merely and it'd feel like that's maybe all that you can ever do with this life of yours.

Hello there, I'm the Earthian.

And you know you can break it, but you'd rather not because the comfort it gives you, at the exact moments when you need it, is irreplaceable, at least in your mind. You really don't know why you're seeking that comfort in the first place, but to heck with whys and hows, it feels good and that's what counts or that's what you think and so you keep doing what you've always been doing. The passage of time speeds up to such an extent that you don't even realize time's passing away when you indulge in them. And that, for a weird reason, makes you feel more alive than actually acknowledging that you are breathing this very moment. But then again, when all is said and done, guilt creeps up your pants and starts biting you where it hurts the most. Because you know, deep down, you know you're lying to yourself. And that's where it all begins.

Love, peace.