Investment.

I'm curious, really, really curious. How in the world am I being sucked into something that has been doing nothing but shoving and shushing me away? Something about the glowing fire draws me into it even though I know very well, I can feel very well that it is burning the life out of me.

Hello there, I'm the Earthian.

It creates a draught, the kind of draught you know exists but nevertheless not mind it too much for you're afraid you even like it deep within. And it does something to you, something I'm not sure how to explain but that's not going to stop me from trying, it never has stopped me ever, why would it this time?
And I'm not even sure chasing this something that only keeps running away from me and even worse pushing me away is doing me any good because at the end of the day, there is always going to be that distance and that distance is only going to increase with increase in time. And it's not like I can't let go of it. For someone who has let go of so many things, letting go isn't the hard part. It's just there is that part in me that doesn't want to let go. It's really funny because there is this other part inside of me that is pleading me to let go and the internal conflict isn't doing me any good either.

My point? Sometimes, it's just hard doing the "logically" right thing to do because there's just too much investment emotionally. What can I do? Well, endure, and then maybe one day, let go.

Love, peace.