Note To Self : Let Go.

No matter what happens, you have to remember, what went bad ten years ago is not going to have a damn thing to do with the life that you live today, no matter what. Just like what went well ten years ago is not going to have anything to do with the person you are today. Good or bad, you have to let go.

Hello there, I'm just a human being who likes to identify himself as "the Earthian" for it feels just a bit more inclusive of everything this planet has to offer.

I remember, five years ago, in my final year of my secondary education, I was doing horribly. Nothing went my way, I had no friends, neither did I have a good educational hold. My confidence had hit the lowest of lows and weirdly enough, kept finding new lows that I didn't even know existed. Fast forward two years, I was in college studying aerospace engineering, and I had reached a point where I could only think of negative things. The company I had, the people I CHOSE to spend time with were all drooling and dripping with negativity and life was nothing more than just mere complaints and whines. Fast forward six months, I had this new found urgency to get things done, mostly because I feared that the consequences will get too bad and get to a level I can't deal with, and because I knew deep down that if I worked hard I'd do better and doing better was paramount to escaping that reality of mine, to forge a better reality. So I worked hard, found better company, company who didn't push me down with negativity but gave me the belief that I needed to know that I too can achieve. And I slowly, but surely built on it and ended up graduating with grades I had to pinch myself to believe that I'd gotten them. The person I used to be ten years ago would have laughed had anyone told him back then that I'd end up doing so badly, because ten years ago, I was straight fire, acing everything I touched. 

But today, right now, none of that matters. Because I'm not the person I was ten years ago, I am not the carefree, happy-go-lucky merchant with overflowing confidence. I am not the idiot who lost all of his confidence for no reason at all, from five years ago. And I am certainly not the person I was a year and a half ago, who found his new energy out of sheer fear and urgency. None of that matters. What I have to look forward to tomorrow has nothing to do with any of that. I can't make my past my source of happiness or sadness or anything in-between. I have in my possession, at this very moment as I'm penning this, a clean slate that fails to recognize neither my glory nor my failures as my story. It urges me to move on. It urges me to find something that's not so transient, to find something that has a little more longevity, to find something that has a little more love. That's what it urges me to seek, happiness that knows no bounds and needs no sources. 

Love, peace.