Do Not Give Up.

I really want to say I've no flaws in me. Trust me, I really do want to say I'm flawless, I'm perfect and I'm the best person you can ever find. I really do want to say all that. But I can't. Because with me, come my flaws, my weaknesses, my failures and my fate that has it's highest ups and deepest lows. And I'm sorry that I am the way I am and I can't make you feel the way you actually do want to feel about me.

Hello there, I'm the Earthian.

You might think that it doesn't bother me, you know me being the way I am. I assure you though, it does. It hurts me everytime I fall back into the same pit I climbed up from. It is frustrating how my weaknesses have the ability to absolutely decimate everything that I think is good about me. It's torturous, torturous everytime my good day gets ruined because of my own flaws in me. It's funny how if I lose my focus on myself for just a second, everything can get cleanly and clearly disastrous. And it hurts so very much when I'm just not able to focus on improving myself when I wholeheartedly want to. Some memory always crawls back up and drags me down into the same pothole I spend months climbing up.
It's saddening, heartbreaking and devastating to witness my life getting ruined, just because of me, just because of what I know are my flaws. I feel helpless and even hopeless at times.

I've wanted to give up so many times. Give up on myself and my heart. I just can't get my mind around to do this though. Because even though my flaws have the ability to ruin me, my few good traits want me to keep pushing. And that's what I'll do. Every single day, I wake with the motivation of destroying my flaws and building a better life. A life that I know I deserve.

And you, if you can resonate with this even on a miniscule level, there is hope for you too.

Lots of love, peace.